La Vie Childfree

According to Dr. Robert Holden, ”the pursuit of happiness has sped up! We are chasing after happiness faster than ever.” In his article, “10 Ways to Find Happiness“  he also says that our happiness levels have not risen in recent years.  

Way #1 in his article is “Define Happiness..” Maybe happiness levels have not risen because people don’t figure out their true answer to this question and commit to making it happen in their lives. 

When I researched my book, Finding Fulfillment From the Inside Out, I found that people’s definition of happiness had everything to do with what life purpose meant to them. Continue reading “Finding Happiness in the New Year” »

The post title is a quote from Melissa Busch, who tells a moving story on RH Reality Check that reminds us of another option related to the parenthood decision. In her case, she decided to have her child but not provide the role of parent.  Like many who decide not to have children, Ms. Busch thought very hard about her decision to become a parent or not.  She ultimately decided that what she could give “emotionally, physically and financially”  was not enough to be the kind of parent she wanted to be.

Ms. Busch now has a 12 year old daughter, has a relationship with her and her adoptive family. In her piece, “Do You Have Children?” she talks about how she sometimes says “no” but sometimes braves the consequences if she answers the truth.  I say brave the truth every time! Her story is a such a reminder that pregancy and parenthood are two separate things.  Continue reading ““I am a mother, I have a child, but I am not parenting”” »

Sociologist Philip Cohen doesn’t think the evidence is there. He challenges a part of a recent study by the National Marriage Project in his post on the Huffington Post, Is the Recession Really Saving Marriages?   Cohen thinks that the report, “The State of Our Unions 2009: Money and Marriage” goes too far when it concludes that “Judging by divorce trends, many couples appear to be developing a new appreciation for the economic and social support that marriage can provide in tough times. Thus, one piece of good news emerging from the last two years is that marital stability is up.”  

Maybe it’s morelike  ”forced “stability.  In their post, “The Year End Round Up in Marriage”Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn cite the poll of 1600 members of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. Nearly 40 percent said that filings were down by 40 percent.

I wonder how adding the dimension of children to the research would affect research findings on divorce trends during tough economic times.  Continue reading “Can a Recession Actually Save Marriages?” »

I learned of a great new organization called Jantaloans. It enables poor families to invest in their children’s education through microloans and scholarships for their primary, secondary, and vocational education. 

Research tells us that the more education women have, the fewer children they have.  With education they learn they have choices in life, especially around one of the most important decisions they will make-parenthood. They have more power to choose how many children they want to have and when, and can learn that not having children is an alternative choice. Education opens the door to taking control of their reproductive lives.

This could happen for Daizimani. She is 11 years old, and lives in Assam, India.  Daizimani wants to be the first in her family to complete high school and become an engineer someday.

Continue reading “Empower Young Women and Girls: Give the Gift of Education” »